Friday, February 1, 2008

My 4 Year Old, The Lawyer

Scene: the van, on the way to school. It is early morning and I have only had half my coffee. I am understandably somewhat foggy.

Abby Kate: Mom, I don't even know why A-S-S is a bad word. Why is A-S-S a bad word?

Me: (startled) Where did you hear that word?

Abby Kate: Lydia at school. She said it and said it's a bad word. But why is ass a bad word?

Me: Um....if you're talking about a donkey -- 'cause it is an old fashioned word for donkey -- then it's okay, but it's also a very rude word for rear end. Then it's not okay.

Grant: Mom, you have to put a nickel in my piggy bank now.

Me: What? Why? I didn't say a bad word (and for the record here, let me state that the "bad word" I occasionally have to pony up for is "gosh")

Grant: Uh, Mom, you did. You said "butt."

Me: No, I didn't. I said "rear end."

Grant: Uh, Mom, "rear end" means the same thing. You have to pay me a nickel.


You know I can't win; I'm outnumbered.

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